From the minute I announced my engagement to DH people started asking me when I was going to start wearing twin sets and volunteering. Everyone, especially those in the military, assumed I would instant morph into the perfect FRG bot wife who would volunteer for every cause, get involved in my husband's career, and start learning Army protocol and give up my punk ways.
And I considered it, I really did. But I couldn't do it. I just couldn't. Maybe if i had become an Army wife when I was 18 things would have been different but by now, I am who I am and there's no changing it. I hate the Army. Yep, I said it. Hell I'll shout it from the rooftops at this point. I hate it. Hate it, hate it, hate it. I love my husband, I support my husband, just like I would support any career he chose. But he's the soldier, not me. I don't need the Army.
Now I know that openly criticizing the Army is considered blasphemy, just like not gushing with gratitude for every crumb the Army throws our way and daring to complain about the constant BS and drama. And I couldn't care less. Why should I be grateful to something that broke my husband permanently by refusing to treat him after he came home wounded from combat? Why should I be grateful for a paycheck that, while it might be steady, is about 1/3 of what my husband could make in the private sector? Especially when he works 14 hour days for that paycheck and misses anniversaries, holidays, birthdays, and other events with his family because the Army cares only about using him up as fast as possible?The Army treats soldiers and their families like crap. I will never ever get down on my knees and gush with gratitude to the Army. As far as I'm concerned, the Army owes us a debt it will never be able to repay.
And everyone told me that I had to start making friends among the other Army wives because it would make life so much easier and I'd need their support. Their support? What support? The support of being told my husband would cheat on me because their husbands cheated on them and "they all do it", which is what one of my friends was told by the Army spouses she worked with when volunteering 50 hours a week at ACS. Army wives are stretched to the breaking point dealing with their own money problems, relationship problems, and stress. I made it through one deployment already with no support from other Army spouses or the Army, I can make it through another.
So I choose to live as Army free as possible, which is one reason why the blog has suffered. I just chose to not acknowledge the Army if I don't have to. And I'm much, much happier that way. I don't go on post unless I have to, don't volunteer, don't get involved. Our home is an Army free zone, as much as it can be. Army life is much, much easier without the Army.